I AM ENOUGH

I am enough

I am enough.

I am enough. I have always been enough. I will always be enough.

I am enough.

Three words that have played a pivotal role in this discovery of happiness that I am embracing.

I have spent a year on a personal, spiritual and emotional journey. I have faced some very confronting lessons and now can look back and see that I have been in and out of depression for more than a decade.

Gaining perspective is such an interesting experience. It is quite foreign when, for the first time since being a child, you are inhaling deeply instead of the gasping for air that had become normal. The feeling of suffocation was comfortable and being disconnected from body and soul felt like the only way to be.

Now I know that it isn't the way to live in your truth. When I was caught in the chaos of it there was nothing about it that seemed odd. It was all I had ever remembered. When I thought of every version of myself throughout my life, that was the feeling that I knew.

This is why perspective is fascinating. I can look back and see it without the lens of depression and so, so many things take on a different meaning.

Relationships look different. Time evolves. Everyone else has morphed.

Including me

I definitely seem like a backwards version to how I thought I was. It is almost overwhelming seeing all of my pain so clearly. I see how so many choices were made out of fear, hurt or doubt. I can almost relive it through these eyes and my heart aches.

At first, when I started looking back, it felt very uncomfortable. I didn't want to know or feel how broken I had been. But then I realised that it is an absolutely essential part of the healing. To presently and consciously recognise depression.

The reason it is so necessary is because, even being on the outside looking in with my newfound perspective, it requires a choice every day to be happy and to feel gratitude.

I have to remember that every day I am the creator of my own destiny so I need to put energy and love into being surrounded by the light. I know where I have been and I know where I am now and I know where I am going.

This is where those three little words come into play.

I am enough.

I am enough.

I am enough.

Three words that I have been seeing, writing and hearing consistently for almost a year. Three words that started my journey of self-belief.

I was introduced to the concept of affirmations and visualisations through an amazing TED talk by a wonderful best-selling author, hypnotherapist, nutritionist and motivational speaker from the U.K.

Shortly after watching this inspiring talk, I was blessed enough to participate in a training call with her and it was a massive catalyst for the nine months that followed.

Now, I always use affirmations in my life and also write in a gratitude journal. Affirmations are phrases that connect with your greatest fears and turn them into affirming, positive beliefs instead. Mine are constantly evolving based on my current life but my favourites have been:

I am enough. I have always been enough. I will always be enough.

I am worthy of great love.

I am worthy of great success.

I am a wonderful mother.

I am an amazing leader.

I am exactly where I am meant to be.

I am never alone. I am always being looked after.

This is one of the many techniques I have used over the last year and I thoroughly recommend anyone who feels stuck to do this. Don't think too much about it. Put your excuses and fears to the side.

Pick up a pen. Write down what you already know you need to hear. Even when you feel like you are lying. Don't put pressure on it. Write.

I AM ENOUGH!

Say it. And then leave it.

And the next day do the same thing. One day it will feel slightly less awkward and you might want to add something else that makes your heart ache with desire.

It could be, “I am brilliant, bright and beautiful” or “I am a good friend.”

Remind yourself it is easy to just write three words every day. It is the beginning of something magical.

I believe in you and the power of your words, voice and thoughts.

Remember...

You are enough.

You are enough. You have always been enough. You will always be enough.

You are enough.

Much love,

Choiwee M.