In the past six months, my physical health has deteriorated, and I’ve had to change some of my coping strategies. My favourites of going for a walk or dancing around my room, I can no longer do. Not only the physical pain I’ve been enduring - but also the ways I’ve learnt to deal with emotional pain have been a challenge for me. I knew chronic illness took a deal on a person’s mental health but I didn’t realise the many ways it does.
If you have a physical illness, you are stronger than you feel. No one understands all the different challenges you face every day. The same applies to mental illness, to continue when your mind is going against you requires great strength. To have both is another level of strength. Every part of you feels like it’s destroying itself and you’re left with your soul.
It’s been a confronting experience to be left with my soul. I’ve been engaging in many outlets I loved as a child: reading, painting, Taylor Swift. These have brought me peace and an escape from the pain when it all becomes too loud. It’s forcing me to figure out my true self outside of the illness. What did you love as a child? What colour is your core? These questions could be a stepping stone for you to find your identity again.
I’ve had to learn new and revisit old coping strategies to adjust to my body’s needs. I can’t stress enough how important it is to listen to your body. If you need rest, rest. If you need stimulation, listen to loud music. If you need creativity, create. Nobody knows what you need more than yourself. You are allowed to put yourself first. Your needs matter. You matter.
-Ellen
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